the deepening ground

We’ve created a false dilemma (aka the either-or fallacy): “Either you remain a child or you become an adult.” And in a time where adultescence has spread like an infectious disease, it seems fitting that we raise high the banner of adulthood and call these basement-dwelling game-playing job-quitting children into the responsibilities and expectations that come with coming of age. However, there remains a strong benefit to being young at heart (cue Frank Sinatra!) In fact, Jesus himself says, “Truly I say to you, unless you change and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3). So when my newly-thirteen-year-old son left my wife and me a note expressing his own regrets at having to leave childhood behind, I began to ponder a poetic response.

In the midst of this busy season of life, snatching moments to write has been challenging. Add to that my desire to allude to Rudyard Kipling’s “If-” and Shakespeare’s advice from Polonius (despite his failings) to his son Laertes, as well as constraining myself to Tennyson’s tetrametric lyrical verse used in “In Memoriam A.H.H.” and you can see how I’ve made my response that much harder to compose. Of course I could just use AI… (don’t get me started!) And so, weeks later (and after an absence of over a month on The Deepening Ground), allow me to present to you “A Father’s Advice on Coming of Age.”

A Father’s Advice on Coming of Age

By Vincent H. Anastasi 2025

Don't worry, son, when troubled thoughts
        disturb your peace with tidings drear
        and all the things that you hold dear
seem threatened by adulthood's costs.

Reject the rush to leave behind
        imagination's make believe,
        the foolish trade of the naive
for lesser powers of the mind.

Our vaunting knowledge of the world
        inflates our pride or leads us wrong;
        create instead new worlds through song
and bring to life your dreams unfurled.

Invest your time in richer things
        than bottom lines and market trends
        and grapple to your soul those friends
whose perseverance grants you wings.

Rise above the expectations
        that limit you to visions grim
        and rather fix your heart on Him —
there you'll find true liberation!

The time will come, but is not now,
        when childish ways we set aside,
        when face-to-face with seeing eyes
our truest selves we will avow.

Until that day, never forget
        like children we must all become,
        so fill your days with distance run
and live your life without regret.